Grandma goes to Court. Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma a question if they're not prepared for the answer.
At a trial in a small southern town, the prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmother, to the stand. He approached her and asked," Mrs. Jones, do you know me?". She responded," why yes, I do know you Mr. Williams, I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, cheat on your wife and you manipulate people and then talk about them behind their back. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realise you'll never amount to anything more than a paper pusher. Yes, I know you". The lawyer was stunned and not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, " Mrs. Jones, doyou know the defence attorney?". She again replied, " why yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster too. He's lazy, bigoted and has a drink problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire State. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women, and one of them was your wife. Yes I know him". The defence attorney nearly died.
The Judge then asked both counsellors to approach the bench. And in a very quiet voice he said, " if either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair!"